Last night i realized how bad a sub i am. I think its mostly due to the fact that Sir and are away from each other and i know he cant physically punish me. I take advantage of that. I told him everything that i haven’t been doing. I have a feeling he’s going to remember and give me back pay when reunited. I thought a lot about my actions. I like to do what i want to do, when i want to do it. It’s hard to give up complete control. i know that i have to get my shit together before we come back to each other. Sir is meticulous. Sir is strong. He is direct and eager to punish me. Its going to make for an interesting blog that’s for sure.

My punishment for yesterday (as a recap, i was told to masturbate and stop after 10 min, i didn’t and i came) was that i was not allowed to masturbate again that night after asking him. i don’t know what has gotten into me but i am ready to go, like ALL the time. On the way home, i was literally dripping in my seat. I can’t stop thinking about Sir giving me my punishments for being a bad girl. I also think i’m a little sadistic because i like the idea of being punished and i may start doing things on purpose, just so i can feel that rush. I know Sir is reading this and shaking his head, ‘What a bad little slut.’ I can’t help myself, Sir. I’m sorry.

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